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Sunday, February 1, 2009

The Day is Fast Approaching...

I just really need to get this off my chest. What a perfect choice of words! There are very few people that know this but on Tuesday I have to go for my first mammogram. Yes, I said mammogram. I am not at all excited about it. I found a small lump in one breast in Dec. and when I went for my checkup she said just watch it and see what happens. Of course I freaked out for a month and checked it everyday. My midwife seemed to think that it was cycle related but it never went away. So, I had to make the call to go back and see her. She scheduled the mammogram for me and said to have it done first and then we can discuss it on Friday when I go and see her. I have a step-sister who just turned 36 that had to have a breast removed in Nov. so I am really worried. I pray everyday that it is nothing. I know that God will make a way no matter what happens. I am just the type of person who hates (this is where McKenna would say "mommy hate is a bad word") to tell people what is going on. It took me almost a month to tell the lady that I work with. I only told her last week. I probably would not have told her then but I had to so I could take the time off to have the mammogram done. I don't know if it is because I don't want people to know because I am not sure myself what is going on, or because I don't want to burden anyone with my problems. I know that I have to let God handle it and not be worried but I am. I know that he is always in control. I know this is not a cheery subject but it is nice to get it out of my system. Thanks for listening (or reading :))

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